Surviving
by Somniare28
Summary: How much would you change when the situation calls for it? What would you do to ensure your own survival each and every day? What kind of person would you become? Who would you betray? What secrets would you keep? It's survival of the fittest, right?


_"We're 2.3 miles away. A few followers, but not too hard to lose."_

"Alright. How much did you manage to obtain?"

_"Not much, but it's something. I'm sure Saitou will be able to make use of it."_

"Sometimes I wonder if we overestimate the guy. Very well, as always make sure to take out any LDs loitering around the basement."

He set the small walkie down, going to check the cameras. As expected a few LDs were waiting around the back entrance of the garage. He didn't worry too much about them. They would be taken care of when Kadota's crew arrived. Their supply of gasoline had run low, but more rations would be given after a confirmation from Shiki-san.

The lights flickered, before settling back to their consistent glow. He looked up at the buzzing fluorescents with an irritated scowl.

_Tch...I guess I'll need to get Saitou back here to look at that generator._

The sound of impatient banging on his door caught broke him from his thoughts as he went to answer. He wasn't surprised to see a very angry Namie with soapy dripping hair and only a small towel wrapped tightly around her body.

"Izaya, you need to get that tech geek to fix the stupid generator! I was in the middle of taking a shower and now the water won't turn back on!"

The raven hair man rolled his eyes, "There's nothing I can do for now, Namie. You know that things tend to malfunction every now and then, so suck it up and deal with it."

She huffed and stomped away, back to her own apartment. Izaya slammed the door shut, going back to his desk to monitor the cameras. He was met with disappointment when the screens read 'OFFLINE.'

_"Izaya, the elevator's not working. Should we leave the load down here?"_

He snatched the walkie off the desk, "You're gonna have to. Another power surge hit. We'll have to go get Saitou."

_"We don't have enough fuel to make the trip."_

"I know that. You'll have to go see Shiki again, though I don't think the van will make it that far. I'll convince him to meet you half way. Just come on up for now, I'll need this line to contact him."

_"Roger that."_

The static ceased from the other end. Izaya twisted the knob, changing it to the other line.

"Shiki-san, come in. Shiki-san."

_"Awakusu here."_

"This is Orihara, I need to speak with Shiki-san."

_"Shiki-san is currently…busy. I'll let him know you radioed in and have him contact you back."_

Izaya let out a dry chuckle. This conversation reminded him of the good old days, "Very well, please inform him as soon as possible."

_"Will do, Orihara-san."_

The line went dead again.

He would have to wait for their 'tech geek,' as Namie liked to call him, to fix the cameras. They could do without them, but Izaya liked to have them operational in case of any kind of emergency. He had the desperate need to see what was going on at all times, especially since information was harder communicate at certain times.

He remembered their first power outage, he had nearly lost his mind. Scrambling around to find a source of power, even a simple flashlight. No one was around, it was deathly silent. He almost made himself believe that he really was all alone. He had locked himself in his room, and the last thing he remembered was Kadota knocking on his door, trying to get him to come out.

When they finally did manage to get him out, they said nothing. No words were needed, they all understood his fear. Izaya was thankful at the time. He didn't want to explain himself, for fear of breaking down right there and then. He didn't care about the situation they were in, he never wanted anyone to see him in such a pitiful state.

He heard the doorknob turning and three pairs of boot clad feet stomping in.

"Other than not being able to bring up your findings, were there any complications?"

Kadota shook his head, "It was a pretty smooth trip. We did hear some shots fired. Sounded like it was around the west exit of Bukuro Station."

"Did you investigate?" Izaya quirked an eyebrow.

"No, it was only a few shots and then we didn't hear anymore."

"Be more cautious next time. I don't want anyone following you here. The only ones to know of our location will be Shiki-san and Saitou. I don't trust Namie's 'friends' and I don't want them following you here."

Kadota was hesitant about following Izaya's orders, but they served for protection. People couldn't be trusted, no matter how desperate and innocent they seemed. They had learned that lesson before.

"Alright, we will."

"Izaya, have you contacted Shiki?" Togusa piped in.

"I did, but he was busy. I was told they would contact us when he was available. For now though, you three can go rest. I won't send you back out there, so good work for today. I'll let you know when I get word from Shiki-san."

The three nodded, before they started filing out of the room. The last one to leave was Erika, she glanced at Izaya who gave her a small smile and then she let the door close behind her with a soft click.

She didn't talk much nowadays. She was always so serious, except around Namie. She absolutely despised Namie and their run ins never really ended well.

She reminded Izaya of how much everyone had changed, including himself. Before he would've loved to amuse himself with their very predictable behavior. How this whole ordeal had affected them and reduced them to their very core. It brought out the darkness that they never knew they had. He would have enjoyed this, if he weren't feeling the same way.

Izaya surprised himself, which was something he never thought he was capable of. Over time, he's realized that there are many things he never knew he was capable of. Also many things he never he feared. His fears, insecurities, his lack of knowledge, it had all dealt a serious blow to his life. He used to be on top of the world and now there were times where he felt even lower than he already was.

This was something he was never able to predict or prepare for. Something he didn't plan. All control had been taken from him and left him flat on his ass.

He was set on regaining that control.

He spent an hour rereading the same old books on his shelf. They ranged from complex reads such as Animal Farm to simple picture books like Dr. Seuss's Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are? As much as he loved a good read, children's books seemed to bring him comfort. They were always filled with positive messages and really expressed the naivety of children. He was so caught up in the colorful illustrations that he almost didn't hear the voice calling him from the walkie.

_"Orihara…Orihara, come in…Orihara!..."_

Izaya quickly got up and grabbed the walkie, "Orihara here. Sorry about that Shiki-san."

_"It's fine, just pay attention next time. So what did you need?"_

"We're low on fuel and we need more. Unfortunately the van won't make it all the way over there. Can you please meet up with them somewhere a bit closer. I don't want them stranded somewhere without protection."

It was quiet on the other side. Shiki was probably contemplating on how he wanted to go about this.

_"Orihara, I can only offer three gallons."_

Izaya's grip tightened on the walkie, "Three gallons?! Shiki are you trying to screw me over?"

_"Watch who you're talking to boy. I'm not obligated to do this you know. It's getting harder and harder for my men to find fuel. Three gallons is all I can give you, take it or leave it."_

"Fine, but I think it would be an even bigger waste to drive there. So we'll go on foot."

_"Are you sure about that? That would be a pretty stupid move to make."_

"At this point, what choice do I have? The van's tank is almost empty. We'll need to conserve fuel for now."

_"Very well. Can you meet us along Meiji Dori Exit? It's closer."_

"Yes, that works. Tomorrow?"

_"What time can I expect you there?"_

"Noon."

_"Don't make me wait Orihara."_

"Thank you again Shiki-san." Izaya turned off the walkie, setting it down with a heavy sigh.

He would gladly send Kadota, Togusa, and Erika out alone when they had the van, but without it he always made himself go with them, however, he didn't like walking around the city. He just didn't want to be responsible for more deaths. Walking around the city was dangerous and they risked their lives every time they stepped out.

He was terrified beyond belief, but it would make him more of a coward to send people out on foot and not accompany them. Izaya was no coward.

...

"Izaya? Do you need something?"

"No, just bored."

Shinra opened the door a bit wider, gesturing for Izaya to come in, "I guess boredom really gets to you when you don't have the internet."

"Or people to talk to." Izaya added.

"That too. So what's up with the electricity? Generator acting up again?" Shinra changed the subject.

"Yeah. It seems to be fine for now, but we can't really get Saitou here. We don't have enough fuel to make the trip. In fact tomorrow I'll be going with the crew to meet up with Shiki."

"There isn't even enough gasoline to go to Shiki's and back?"

Izaya shook his head, "No. Shiki told me that all they can give us is three gallons."

"Three gallons?!"

"That's what I said. He says it's getting harder to find it around here. And as annoying as it is, I can't blame him. It's too dangerous to venture out to far. We've been surviving just fine the way we are. We have plenty of necessities and I guess fuel isn't a big one unless we needed to leave, which isn't going to happen anytime soon."

Shinra nodded, "I can understand that. But we aren't the only ones around here. Besides us, and Shiki of course, there's also that other group that Saitou's with. And I'm pretty sure there are more people still in Ikebukuro. I hear gunshots sometimes."

"Well if those people keep shooting rounds in Ikebukuro then that will only mean less problems for us. Less LDs and less competition."

The doctor's eyes narrowed, "You're cruel."

"I'm realistic." Izaya shot back.

"We should be helping those people." Shinra frowned.

Izaya sighed, "Shinra, we've discussed this before. I'm not a charity. I'll gladly help someone that is of use to me, but I can't take in every person that comes begging at my door."

"You say that as if the whole city will be coming to you."

"It's like a domino effect Shinra. Once someone hears of a promised sanctuary, more will surely follow."

"You of all people should know how terrifying it is to be out there alone."

Izaya scoffed, "And like being here alone isn't any different?"

"We all have each other."

"You all have each other." the raven emphasized, " I'm only here because no one else wants to be in charge. You could all easily throw me out."

"We wouldn't do that to you!" Shinra argued.

"If you were tired of dealing with me then you would."

"We need you. We all need each other. And those people out there need us."

"Well we don't need them. Unless they can contribute to the group like the rest of us, then there is no point."

"What about your sisters, huh? How the hell did they ever contribute?!"

Izaya clutched the old switchblade in his pocket and it only took Shinra a second to realize his mistake. They both sat in silence cursing themselves internally for letting their emotions go.

"That was a low blow, I'm sorry."

The raven slowly shook his head, "No you're right. They were only here because of my own selfish needs. I know I'm a hypocrite. It cost me those two to realize it."

More silence.

"Do you think Celty will come back?"

Izaya felt an ache in his chest. Even if she was gone, Shinra still had Celty. Izaya however, didn't have anyone, "I know she will. She's probably missing you more each day…I'm sorry."

"For what? You didn't do anything."

"I gave her, her head back." Izaya reminded him.

"She needed it. She needed to find the others and see if there was some kind of solution to this mess. Plus, she hates you, not me."

Izaya chuckled, "That's good."

The two friends sat there, no more words needed to be spoken. Sure they've hit a rough patch since this all started, but they always managed to forget the harsh words and try to back to the way they used to be.

Izaya left with a simple wave, receiving a nod.

...

_"Please Iza-nii! We never get to spend time with you!"_

_"Iza-nii…no time…"_

_The raven sighed, "Don't you two go out with mom and dad?"_

_"Yeah, but it's not the same! You always used to take us out. Please! It's just for ice cream!"_

_"Vanilla…french…"_

_"See!" Mairu squished up her sister's face and held it in front of Izaya, "Kururi still remembers you're favorite flavor!"_

_"Why don't you two go with Namie?"_

_"Nuo fwun…" Kururi spoke between her squooshed cheeks._

_"Hey! I'm not babysitting them!" said secretary had yelled from the other room._

_The two twin sisters looked to their brother with hopeful gazes. His face remained indifferent but even after all these years he couldn't say 'no' to those faces. _

_"Namie! Postpone my next appointment!" he got a frustrated growl in response._

_"EEEEEEEEE!" The two girls jumped up and down, or more like Mairu jumped up and down bringing Kururi with her, "Come on Iza-nii! You're buying!"_

_"Of course…" He picked up his wallet and keys heading out the door with both of his younger siblings clinging onto each of his arms. _

_..._

_"Coffee…"_

_"I want Cookies and Cream! Ooh! There's also cheesecake! No wait, there's cinnamon swirl! Ok I change my mind, I want Cookies and Cream!"_

_"Coffee…"_

_The young woman behind the counter tried her best to keep her fake smile from wavering. Izaya applauded her patience with his sisters, since he had already lost his. The same thing happened every time he took them out for ice cream. Mairu would make a big fuss over which flavor she wanted to get and in the end she would always settle for her favorite Cookies and Cream. Meanwhile Kururi would keep announcing the flavor she wanted, which as always was Coffee. They usually went to different shops but the flavors were all the same. The employee would always try and keep calm for the three strange Oriharas, but Izaya could see that they only wanted them to leave more than anything._

_Izaya slapped a hand over Mairu's blabbering mouth, "We'll take three cones, one scoop each. Cookies and Cream, Coffee, and French Vanilla."_

_The girl nodded and quickly got to work on their orders. _

_Even with a hand covering her mouth, Mairu kept talking while Kururi looked between the two. It wasn't until Izaya felt something warm and wet on his hand that he quickly retracted his hand._

_"Mairu!"_

_"Not my fault Iza-nii! I couldn't breathe!"_

_"You can breathe through your nose." The raven grumbled as he grabbed a napkin and cleaned off his sister's spit. _

_"H-Here you go." The girl held out two of the cones and the twins snatched them up._

_"Aw! Iza-nii still remembers!" Mairu licked the frozen treat from her cone and Kururi soon followed as well. The informant was handed his cone and he paid for the ice cream before they left the store. _

_"Iza-nii!" _

_"What?" Izaya didn't have time to register what had happened until the two were suddenly laughing at him. Something cold and creamy was melting on his nose and it had a strong caffeinated scent to it. He didn't have to ask. Even if it was Kururi's ice cream, Mairu was obviously the perpetrator. While the youngest of the two didn't hold back on her obnoxious laughter, the older one stifled a few giggles. _

_Izaya couldn't help but let an amused smile grace his lips._

...

His eyes fluttered open. He looked over at the window, seeing that it was still pretty dark outside. It was either really late at night or really early in the morning. What was the difference?

He felt that familiar moisture in his eyes and it was already too late to stop the tears from flowing. He choked out a strangled sob. His arms wrapped around himself as he curled up into a ball. He always made sure to keep quiet for fear that someone or something out there would hear him. He cried into his pillow which was already a little moist from his sweat.

He never had nightmares. Only dreams. And those dreams hurt him more than any nightmare ever could. He was already living the nightmare. Those dreams made him never want to wake up.

"M-Mairu…Kuru…"

The broken man was left to weep, alone.

.

.

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So this is the first chapter or prologue? I can't really tell from here. But it does exist in the Durarara world. And for my Shizaya fans out there, this is one of those fics! Well not now, but eventually, so you'll have to wait. Sorry.

But another VERY IMPORTANT note. I am posting this as an option. I have so many ideas for fics right now, that I had to write them all down. So I wrote the 'first part' of each of those ideas. "Surviving" is one of them. So hopefully by the end of next week I will be posting the first chapter/part/prologue, of each of those ideas I have. So basically, whichever story you like best then I want you to place your vote for the continuation of that story. You can vote by reviewing and putting "Continue" on the story you want me to continue. I will eventually finish all the story ideas because I love them so much, I can't drop them. BUT, whichever story has the most votes to continue it, will be the first one I finish.

SO PLEASE DO NOT VOTE YET! Please comment your feedback! I like feedback on this, but DO NOT review "CONTINUE" until all of the voting selections have been posted here. And I promise I will let you know when I have posted all the selections.

Oh and all the story selections will be Shizaya too. I just love Shizaya 3

Durarara or it's characters do not belong to me, they belong to Ryohgo Narita  
>There will be OCs (as you can see in this chapter) they belong to me.<p> 


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